God's Love in our unbelief

I have gone back and forth in my relationship with God on

the issue of trust.

While I realize that this is a lifelong journey, I can't say that I'm not always appalled by the knowledge that I'm so far removed from the faith I think I have. I thank God daily for our Saviour, Jesus Christ, and the intercession of the Holy Spirit, our guide and comforter in a fallen world.

I love my God,

my Beloved Father in Heaven, and I know that without a doubt, but I know that:

I love Him only because He Loved me first (unconditionally)
His Love in me is what makes me capable of love at all
He is working with me always to perfectly manifest His Love in me
Every time I grow in that Love, He allows it to overflow to those around me
I know that my God is good and sovereign, and that no one is born 'by accident'. We all have a purpose - one significant to Him.

Sin and the enemy's deception

Still, our enemy who roams like a roaring lion seeking to steal, kill and destroy our lives (literally) - an enemy that is not flesh and blood, but spiritual powers and principalities (

Ephesians 6:12 Amplified Version

) - is persistent.

I detest my sin nature, the sins I slip into from time to time and escape readily through conviction, as well as those sins that keep me in bondage, even when my eyes are opened to the knowledge that I am free to walk away from them. I detest the power that I have given these sins in my life, and I am not sure about how to walk in freedom from them, except that

in Christ I can do all things

(

Philippians 4:13

) - we have the authority to stop the enemy. Having

put on His armour,

during the times that I walk in wisdom (

Ephesians 6:13-18

), knowing that

the Word is my sword,

I know that

we are conquerors in Christ,

that if we

resist the devil he will flee

and that

our salvation is finished already in Christ,

we are simply walking it out.

For all the sins I cannot escape,

Hebrews 13:1-9

, particularly verse 5, reminds me that my key sin is

unbelief.

Do you truly trust God in Christ?

Do you truly trust God in Christ, or do you only trust Him when things don't go wrong?

Image Source:

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Throughout 2013, I have struggled with the knowledge that I don't - and it rocked my world. How could I not trust God after all the miracles I've lived through?! We judge

the Israelites

in the desert during the Exodus from Egypt for seeing miracles yet doubting God, but how different are we? We attack

Adam and Eve

- Eve for eating the forbidden fruit and Adam for looking on and saying nothing - but is our faith that God would not forsake us any stronger?

I know that my entire walk with God is a journey to learn to

Love as He Loves

- Love everyone unconditionally - and that stems from understanding. To Love Adam, Even, the Israelites of Exodus, we walk in their shoes. Whose shoes are you walking in?

I often feel like I'm walking in David's shoes.

In those moments, my David moments, when I'm about to hang my head in shame, I remember that

David was a man after God's own heart,

and I run after God, again. I try to run with Jacob's boldness. I LOVE my God.

He will never leave us. People need the Gospel

Whatever you're going through, whatever you're doing in secret, whatever wavering your faith is doing, I pray that God bring you - us - back to reality. There is no time for you to agree with your accuser, that you 'are what you do'. There is no time (

Matthew 24

). Knowing that we are already saved, we still stumble. We have hope! What about those who don't? How much worse is their plight?

There's only time for you to know who you are in Christ. We are born in sin - and the enemy would love to keep our heads buried in that, as though that's the end of our story. Don't let his lies in! That was the beginning of your story. Our journey is a milli-second-by-milli-second series of repentant moments - joyfully repentant moments - because we know that we actually have had our sin debt paid in full. We know that

even this trial

(however big, long, deep, dark) is not bigger than God, and cannot separate us from the Love of God (

Romans 8:35-39

). We need to share that knowledge!