Following God & Loving Others

On April 14th, 2014, I wrote

"

Letting Go - Serving God Not Mankind

"

because I'd realized that I'd gotten stuck in making sure everyone is happy. There's a difference, however, between being responsible in your treatment of others and being responsible for the happiness of others.

Source:http://lovecoversall-godislove.blogspot.ca/2014/06/following-god-loving-others.html

Yesterday, I posted something on Facebook (I tend to post only encouragement, so this was rare):

"

I fell for that age-old trick. No more. I will not compromise. My ability to do what is right is not an affront to you. Be where you are, I will celebrate your successes, but don't ask me to be less so you can feel validated.

"

I was having a rough day - a downward spiral in my mind of everything I've done wrong and how my mistakes may have made others' stumble. I sometimes think I'm alone in this, but yesterday, so many people related so strongly to this post, that I started to realize that this is an issue many others probably face. We have to find a way to stop. Happiness is not perfection; it is being in Christ.

Right now, thanks to my Church,

The Well on Bayview in Toronto, Ontario

, I'm doing the

Leadership Development Program, Level 1 (LDP1)

developed and delivered in Christ by the

Bethel Church in Redding California

. This month, we're building a

culture of Prophecy

into our lives, built on the foundation of God's Love - and never on condemnation. We meet monthly to share how the culture is showing up in our lives. Yesterday's session, which preceded that Facebook post, was really amazing. The whole meeting was about the myths that hold us back from speaking God's positive truth about people's lives into being, and it made us face a lot of our obstacles.

By the time I'd gotten home, however, I'd started to see how many people in my life I've fallen into "holding myself back" for, so they can feel better. Whether that's a sin they're still struggling with, that I don't struggle with anymore, or my drive and discipline around work and quality, that they either don't care about or haven't achieved yet.

The opposite is also true, though. There are things I still struggle with, that others have probably never struggled with, and they really look down their noses at me for it. Often, the same people I don't come down on for being weak in my strengths.

Yesterday afternoon, I felt like I was drowning. The burden of walking on eggshells:

holding myself back because of other people's need for validation, and

beating myself up because I make mistakes and I'm afraid I've corrupted others by sharing,

is simply too much. Recently, however, I've been repeatedly reminded that that is not my burden to carry. God gets my attention, however He does it (bless Him) and says

"stop! You answer to me. Not everyone's needs/expectations."

It's still hard to move that knowledge from my head to my heart, but I caution those of us who spend all of our time in community and carry this burden, that this is a big part of why we all need some time alone with God. Lately, I've been hearing a lot of teaching about "community in Christ", and that is very important, but the message on "personal time with Christ" has been dangerously silent.

For your sanity and your relationship with Christ, make the time to simply

sit with God and 'BE'.

Share all those those inner thoughts you have never shared with anyone, release all of those emotions you never release because they're "bad/wrong/evil/not self-controlled", in your moments alone with God. Only then, when these things are all brought into the light, that God can heal them in you. Community offers support, yes, but faith comes from your own personal

Love Encounter with God in Christ

.

Make the time.

If you're on Facebook, feel free to follow me on the

"Love covers All . God is Love" Facebook Page

,

for daily or at least weekly, encouragement. Bless you in the Love of Christ! Amen.

Single Christian Women & Marriage

I wasn't going to touch this with a 10-foot pole, because I truly believe in the individual and am saddened by a world - particularly insecure men and women - who take a mega-phone to the streets talking about "why christian girls remain single", without walking half a mile in those girls' shoes.

After a close friend sent me this blog post, "

5 reasons why many christian girls remain single

", my stomach really turned. Some women may be Sarah, but in my experience, that's not most women. I realized that if I don't write this, then perhaps no one will, and too many young girls will wind up further misunderstood and attacked because of this thinking.

Source:

lovecoversall-godislove.blogspot.ca/2014/06/single-christian-women-marriage.html

A Day in the Life of a Christian Girl, Woman

Ages ~5-12

My disclaimer: what you're about to read not everyone's story, but it's the story of many women I grew up with, and have spoken to, to-date.

From the time you wake up, to the time you go to bed, you're taught that you must keep improving. You always have to be better, quieter, smarter, stronger, more humble, kinder, cleaner, more lady-like (no clear definition there), the

Proverbs 31 woman

. Without ever saying it, they teach us, essentially, to be a doormat.

You wake up thinking about the mistakes you will not make today, and go to bed ashamed of all you did wrong that day.

Ages ~12-18

Then, out of nowhere, puberty begins, and you have to "learn to say 'No'". No one quite explains the application of this 'learning to say No', when all our upbringing is about 'meeting with everyone's approval' or, essentially, "saying 'Yes'" to everyone. In fact, you've always been disciplined for saying "No". "No" is a word reserved for the rude, impolite, ill-trained among us. Still, that's the expectation.

Yet, we are to continue to be above everyone's reproach, which essentially teaches us that everyone's opinion of us is valid and important, further teaching us to assume that everyone's mind is sound enough to have a valid opinion of us; opinions that we must keep positive at all times. How do we "be" all of this and say "No", again?

Ages ~19 Until We Reprogram Ourselves

The answer? We don't learn to '"be" all of this and say "No"'. Hence, we have a society of women walking around "

addicted to approval

" and willing to do anything to get it - from everyone. Remember, 'doing anything' ranges from isolating ourselves so we never sin, to delivering on the depraved desires of society's most perverse minds, all in the hopes of one day receiving that approval. For the purpose of this blog post, we'll look at those prone to "isolating ourselves so we never sin" - as these tend to want perfect husbands.

Even God says that humans are insatiable. As a result, we cannot ever please everyone. We can't even please one person! Many don't know, and may never learn, this. Even when we know this, it takes time to undo years of programming.

The result: our families must also be 'above reproach' to the world. Our husbands, therefore, must have the same goal. The double-standard we raise our society with, however, means there are few men who were raised with this kind of burden. Men are then encouraged, by older men and women alike, to label their female peers: Frigid, B--tch, Crazy. Do you see where the devil has succeeded in destroying the family? Can you see where it starts?

Worse, with the constant fear driving Christian society to "keep boys and girls apart", Christian adults are learning about each other from media, books, misinformed adults and everything except conversation. We cannot relate to each other.

Are You Getting The Picture?

THAT is the challenge single Christian women face. Many of us will not get out of that loop. Can you imagine constant fear of losing God's love, your salvation, fear of going to hell, all because you 'slip up'? Marriage is also the one thing you can't 'undo'. Try living with that burden on your shoulders before you walk around spitting fire at 'single christian women'!

The Solution

So then you understand even more the soothing waters of the river of life that stems from Christ, for a woman who's lived the life above. "You mean I'm loved regardless?!" We still don't grasp it, but it's a flicker of hope! Jesus Christ means more to us than anything!

Jesus Christ, the Way, the Truth and the Life (John 14:6)

We're called to please or answer only to God. In fact, He doesn't even call us to please Him. That's impossible. He calls us to surrender (

Matthew 6:24-34 ESV

), so He can

shower us with His Love

, which is what changes the desires of our hearts.

To Future Husbands

You can wallow in the insecurity of rejection, or you can decide whether or not this girl is worth it. Pursuit is not "aye girl. I like you." Particularly for the girl above, it is hard work. And unlike you, Jesus was willing to do it. You have had the good fortune, some of you, to grow up accepted as you are. Find a way to teach her what that feels like.

Remind her that marriage is not about marrying the man who is better, more intelligent, stronger, more humble, kinder, cleaner, more manly. Help her, through relationship, to see that marriage is about partnering with your provider and protector, who is very much human, and needs her to help him excel. Just as she needs you for the same.

Encouragement & Caution

Pray for each other. Prayer truly is powerful. This is what conquers the enemy and his attacks against our families. Pray, and keep praying in faith.

Young Men

I am not saying to take abuse. If someone is always calling you "no good", and critiquing you, you might have to run.

However, do not run because it's hard. Decide that she is worth it, and commit. You show her that you love and support her regardless of anything, and the person you pursued because of whatever intrinsic qualities you saw, will reciprocate. Place no conditions on your love for her, and she will reciprocate. She truly is worth the fight.

That is how I found my husband-to-be. He is not what I dreamt of, but he's so much more. I was swept off my feet by a man who emulated God in ways of love that I could never fathom. He has loved the unloveable in me, and nothing speaks louder of love.

Young Women

Likewise, do not suddenly drop all of your standards and say "God can fix anything, so I can marry anyone and God will make it work."

However, stop running the course they put you on. Turn of the recording of "I must be perfect", He must be better" and the other nightmares that reel on in our heads. God is not going to punish you for marrying a man with 'more flaws than you have'. God will use your strengths to uplift (not criticize) him in those areas, and (believe it or not) vice versa. Trust me. God really only shows us what we can handle. We have far more flaws that we will ever see all at once. He is just kind to us about it because He loves us.

Please, please, when you turn it off, try to stop seeing all that's wrong and needs fixing - with him and with yourself - and ask: Can I build a life in Christ with this man? Are his values the same, even if we falter? Just as he sticks with you, stick with him. He's worth it.

A Glimpse at the Price of Surrendering to Christ (Mark 8)

This morning, on "

God is Love - Love Covers All (Facebook page)

, I posted

Mark 8:35 (NIV)

 and said, "I'm starting to see this in so many different ways..." If you read it in context (

Mark 8 NIV

), there's so much in that chapter.

The Feeding Miracles

Miracles:

He fed 4,000 with 7 loaves and collected 7 baskets of leftover. He reminded them that he fed 5,000 with 5 loaves and 12 baskets leftover.

Interlude:

A few minutes later, He warned the disciples to "beware the yeast of the Pharisees, and that of Herod". As with most of us, who keep seeing our sin, forgetting that we have a Saviour, they though 'oh no! It's because we left the baskets of bread! We just have one now!' Jesus had to spell it out. He said their eyes were closed and their hearts hardened. What keeps your eyes on your circumstances instead of on Christ? Do you remember why Peter was able to walk on water? (

Matthew 14:22-33 NIV

) Do you remember why he started to sink?

Lesson:

All after He'd given thanks and broken the bread. God's math surpasses our logic. Give thanks and walk in faith and He'll move everything to meet your needs (came to mind that if all you have is bad food, He can make even that, nourishing!). There is nothing He cannot do. More, there is nothing we cannot do when we walk in Him, in Love.

The Healing Miracle

Miracle:

He took the blind man out of the city to restore his sight. He put His spit on the blind man's eyes to restore His sight.

Interlude:

Do you have that kind of faith? In his shoes would you have said "what the hell?!" and walked away without ever knowing what you missed because of pride? Or would you have surrendered your pride (riskyyy) and stepped out in faith to 'watch Christ work'?

Lesson:

(obviously) if you walk with God in Christ through the intercession of the Holy Spirit by faith, then regardless of how ridiculous the task you're called to, you'll do it. That is what says you know the God you serve.

The Point

Then He closes with 'if you fight for your life you'll lose it, but surrender it to me, and you will gain all'. Those were examples of what we could do, if we trust Him, walk in Him! This doesn't even scratch the surface of all the meaning in, the depth of, this chapter. (The Word is so awesome.)

Source:

www.kingjamesbibleonline.org/Inspirational-Images/large/Mark_8-36.jpg

 for this post - 

lovecoversall-godislove.blogspot.ca/2014/06/a-glimpse-at-price-of-surrendering-to.html

Everyone reads

Matthew 6:25-34 (NIV)

, and says lightly that they'll drop everything to 'seek first His kingdom', so they could have everything. Well, that means laying down all of your idols to make God in Christ Jesus first. Pride, power, stability, control, money, some friends and relatives - all that you hold above God - lay it down. Ready?

Praying for you to have such a strong love-encounter with God, that it would be inevitable that you put Him first. Amen.